In December 1970, I gave birth to a baby boy and placed him for adoption. I was 19, unmarried and was encouraged by my family to have an abortion. Thankfully, God gave me the strength to refuse the abortion. To spare my family any embarrassment I said I would go away, have my baby and give it to a family who could give it a better life.
I loved my baby as much as any mother loves her child. So the day I stood before the judge to sign the papers for adoption was the hardest day of my life. I was told to swear with my hand on a Bible that I would never try to find him. (This was a closed adoption). I felt as though my heart would break and I seriously considered telling him to get me my baby because I can't do this. Then I thought about the parents who were expecting to receive a baby and how devastated they would be and I decided I could not do that to them. So I put my hand on that Bible and swore I would never try to find him. Needless to say, there were numerous emotional issues for me over the years, but I knew God was in control and had my baby in his very capable and loving hands.
In 2017, I heard on the news that closed adoption files in Missouri dating back to the 1940's would be opened for medical information as of January 1, 2018. I had been praying for years that God would make it possible for me to know about my son and now my hopes soared! I picked up the forms to complete and return them to the State. I was discouraged when I didn't receive a response, so I re-filed the papers.
In December 2018, I received a friend request on Facebook from a man in another state. We had no friends in common, so I declined the friend request.
In January 2019, I saw a pop up message which read: "Hi..my name is Martin. Did you have a baby in December 1970? I received a copy of my original birth certificate and my mother's name is Rose". It was my son!! His message to me was "I want to thank you for my life and let you know what a great life I've had." At this, my tears were freely flowing because this is what my heart longed to hear. He had only good things to say about his mother. It was clear he adored her which thrilled my heart?
In August 2019 I was blessed to have dinner with Martin and his wife. I got to hug my 48 year old baby and spend 2 hours with him.
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The education on this website is intended for general education purposes only and should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional counseling, medical or prenatal care. Please note, our center does not perform nor refer for abortions.